Being a Parent in the 2020's

Times have changed. When I was growing up, you were what you were. There were no discussions about sexuality until high school. At least for me and my friends. Now, my child has entered middle school and it seems to be front and center. I have to say that I find it freeing that children can explore different pathways much more freely in the 2020s. More than when I was in middle school. But there are also more stresses put on our children today. Where we didn’t talk about sexuality, there also wasn’t the pressure to decide one way or another. Now, I know there are lots of kids out there who say “why put a label on it!” and I totally agree with this sentiment, but on the flip side, it seems like there is quite a bit of pressure for kids to label themselves as something. One example I am thinking of, is clothing choices. Some children seem to feel that they are more comfortable in dressing in clothing that is not considered “traditional” for their assigned birth sex. For some kids, they might feel like this means they are not relating to their assigned birth sex, so they are Transgender. This is not necessarily true. Just because you choose to wear clothing from the “boy” section or the “girl” section in the school does not mean you are transgender. With that being said, there are transgender children out there. Do we dismiss children who truly feel trapped in a body? No of course not, but how do we support our children who are exploring their sexuality, their fashion sense, but encourage them to not label themselves?

I am no expert in any way, shape or form. I really cannot tell you what is the correct answer here. What I can tell you is what my husband and I are doing. We are supporting our child. If they want to change their hair, clothes, even their name, we are there, supportive of their choices, but also there if things change again. Remind them they do not need to stick to one idea or another, to know that things are not permanent, they are flexible your entire life. Maybe even sit and have a conversation about my feelings, thoughts, and likes/dislikes when I was of the same age.